Over the past several days, reading other posts, fear has come up. So today I thought I would share my experience on one occasion with fear. I can remember a time in my life when fear paralyzed me. So afraid of what was coming, all I could do was scream. Another time so engulfed in fear in the dark, I could not move until the sun came up. God brought me through both of those experiences and gradually taught me about fear and that He did not give me a spirit of fear. When it finely dawned on me that fear is a spirit and not so much a feeling, I learned to stand my ground instead of giving in to the feelings.
When I had to face a breast biopsy, fear came over me but God gently reminded me, only the circumstance had changed but he was still God. and would bring me through whatever I had to face. Everything was fine, but, it taught me a lesson I have never forgotten. Our circumstance changed daily but, HE IS STILL GOD AND HE NEVER CHANGES.
One night the spirit of fear made a visit, I know that it was a spirit that visited me and I rebuke fear whenever it rears its ugly head.
Go with me on another Journey Of Grace, when The Touch Of Fear, came to visit.
The Touch Of Fear
Fear = This word in English has two principal meanings; first, that apprehension of evil which normally leads one either to flee or to fight. Second, that awe and reverence which man of sense feels in the presence of God and to a king or other dread authority.
July 19th, 2012. The heartache I felt, when I learned of the theater shooting in Colorado, just after midnight. A senseless killing. No one in that theater deserved to die, to be injured, or have to suffer the effects for years to come. My heart goes out to everyone that was touched by the sorrow of what that man has done.
I am reminded this man is not the real enemy. This mans enemy and ours, seeks to kill or destroy, each and everyone of us. He used one of us against another, all the time.It is only the grace of God and the acceptance of Christ as our Savior, that keeps us all from becoming the person behind the gun.
As I listened to different survivors, one young man really got my attention. Part of what he said was,"I had to wash the fear off of me."I was gripped by that because I do understand exactly what he was saying. I lived under fear for years. A fear that I would drown, or fall from an amusement park ride. I was afraid to take chances. I feared people, rejection, sickness, and most of all I feared being alone.
To be alone took me back to my high school year. I was terrified being home alone one December day. Feeling I was losing my mind and knew I would never find my way back. It took a doctor that recognized the signs to pull me through.
Over the years, fear would raise its ugly head from time to time. I had read in the Bible and heard Pastors say, that God does not give us a spirit of fear. When fear would overcome me, I learned to rebuke it and call on God's grace and peace for every circumstance in my life.
There came a time however that fear became a different realization to me. David was out of town, the boys were gone, and I was alone for the night. I went to bed but left lights on in the house, I didn't want the darkness. Not long after I lay down, I was suddenly startled by a very strange feeling on my right foot. Not in my foot, but, on my foot. I realized my foot was in fear, and a moment later my ankle was in fear, and it was moving up my leg. I know that sounds crazy, but, it was reality for me. I thought, what in the world is going on. The Holy Spirit spoke to my heart, "That is the spirit of fear touching you." I sat up in bed and said,"Satan, I refuse this spirit of fear. I rebuke you in the name of my Lord Jesus Christ and order you to leave." And then, "Lord, thank you for your peace and grace." I know the blood of Christ covers me, I lay back down and peacefully went to sleep.
Fear is a spirit that I refuse to allow to rule my life. Will I always be able to resist an attack.? I don't know, I'm not arrogant enough to say, I have it completely defeated. That would open me up for fear to challenge me, but, I pray God will always give me the wisdom and knowledge to recognize what is going on.
Yes, I do understand how the young man could say, "I need to wash away the fear." I pray those that are in fear because of what has happened in Colorado, will recognize that it is a spirit that is real and torments their lives, and they can call on the God that has defeated the father of fear.
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